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In general, the situation is as follows: one cold autumn day, my classmate (17 years old, interested in mysticism and psychology, like me) confessed to me that she liked me. I was new to the class and didn’t really interact with anyone, including her. In general, we began to correspond, went for a walk once. It seemed to me that she was in love (perhaps she was at that time), she was afraid to look me in the eye, she said that she was very happy about our communication and wanted to introduce her to her friends.
The trouble is that I also fell in love, and seriously, I couldn’t think about anything but her (although I hadn’t paid any attention to her before). I told her that I liked her too, and that's where the changes began.
She stopped writing first quite quickly, I started doing this (infrequently, 3-4 times a month), I began to refuse meetings due to being busy with school, and in general communication became different (I just felt it).
About two months passed, and I decided to “sort things out” (probably in vain), she was surprised by this as if I had initiated this acquaintance. It’s already beginning to seem that way to me.
A week later, she said that she was not ready for a relationship (because her career was important to her and she “had no one to rely on”), but she and I could just communicate (i.e., correspond). I said that I could wait, to which she replied that many years would pass and she could change a lot during this time. In general, I decided to stop communicating.
About two months have passed since then, but I still cannot let go of this situation, constant thoughts and strong feelings, apathy. This interferes with studies and life in general. I don’t understand why I’m so stuck on it; this has never happened to me before. And there is no end in sight to all this.
I understand that, most likely, her words about not being ready for a relationship are just an “excuse,” but then I don’t understand why she started all this. Judging by her behavior, she doesn't care anymore.
Is it possible to somehow change this situation and return interest? Or is it better to try to stop loving and leave it in the past? And how do you generally look at all this?
