I want my classmate ⇐ Gay forum

[Anonymous]

Briefly speaking. There is one guy in our class, he’s so blond, his eyes are incredible green. And he’s all so slender, short, his skin is snow-white, like porcelain. In general, he doesn’t communicate with anyone at all, he studies well and sits diligently, but I don’t really have any friends either and I basically wanted to make friends with him. Well, in short, we started talking as a couple, sometimes we sit together, and we return home together. In general, we have been talking for a long time and he is so cheerful, so modest and his smile is simply amazing, and he grabs his tiny nose when he laughs again. And I'm just floating. To the point of impossibility.  I look more and more at his collarbone, peeking out from under his shirt, at such a thin neck that I want to grab it, and then unbutton his shirt and touch him all over. His body is also covered in moles, all snow-white. In short, he’s at my house sometimes, we do homework together, we play video games, and even my parents weren’t at home, and we were fooling around. They fought as a joke, knocking each other down. And somehow it so happened that I knocked him down and grabbed him by the hands and spread them on both sides. And he looks at me with his impossible eyes, flutters his lush eyelashes, smiles and brings his eyebrows together. My breathing became faster. And I quickly got up from him, my ears straightened out. And he asks like what happened, and I look at him and just can’t. He’s in his stretched-out T-shirt and pants, and his knees are sharp, thin, and really stick out. I really wanted to undress him and look at his naked body. But I somehow pulled myself together, we continued fooling around, and then he knocked me down. Moreover, I have a large build, much larger than him, and he sat on me like a feather, hips against hips, that I felt his body down there...
And he was still fidgeting and laughing, and I couldn’t restrain myself and I touched his hair. He looked at me strangely, and I said that I needed to go to the toilet and it was crazy how quickly he ran away.
I got hard on him... I never got hard on someone live, only on porn, and I had to masturbate right in the bathroom, locking myself while he was sitting there in my room. And I was so ashamed, but so good at the same time and I imagined him..
I wanted to take my penis and move it over his face, and for him to take it into his mouth and swallow it, and for his eyebrows to move and his crimson lips they were all wet in the lubricant, so that he would gag and choke, and I would just fuck into his throat, and so that he would grab his silky and blond hair, and so that I could hear his thin and plaintive voice...
Then I came simply indescribably. I had never finished like this before, even my shoulders trembled. I returned to the room, and he was sitting there quietly, writing something. And I felt so ashamed that I fantasized about him like that, because he’s just an innocent angel, and most likely also a virgin. And I couldn’t look him in the eyes; in general, it was awkward that day.
And then at school I can’t concentrate at all in class, I only think about him, I imagine him in some kind of fucking clothes on his knees with my dick in his mouth, I draw him in the most indecent positions, and then I despise myself for it . In short, it sucks, I don’t know what it is, falling in love or just sexual attraction, and I’m not gay at all.. But damn, every minute I think about how I want to touch, stroke, kiss him..
Tell him the truth? I'm afraid he'll think I'm crazy or God forbid he'll tell someone. And I don’t even give a fuck about others, I really don’t want to lose him, I don’t want him to stop communicating with me, I’m so used to this sun and I love looking at it.. In general, tell me what to do, I’m already going crazy..